Trans Inclusion and Desire

We've come a long way in the last decade as various diverse communities that support many beautiful ways of embodying and living queerness.

From the early days of trans liberation, Stonewall, Compton's Cafe, and the start of the LGBT** rights movement.... depending on where you live, we now have established spaces wherein trans folks have become increasingly more included and desired in what were formerly binary gendered, exclusively gay male and lesbian spaces.

Trans men, male and masculine identified folks have reaped the benefits in a change in knowledge and acceptance regarding the sexuality and status of transsexual and transgender community members. T-guys and trans-masculine types have gone from being cast out of lesbian spaces in the early 70s, to a hot commodity in many queer women's spaces. This is due in no small part to the deconstruction of masculine norms, a greater understanding re: queer masculinities, a blossoming of multifaceted queer sexualities, and de-stigmatization of the process of trans health and transitioning. Many trans guys have also benefitted from deliberately busting out of male gender norms, flirting and flaunting their gender queerness as well as range of queer, gay, bi and pansexuality. While trans guys who date and have sex with cis (gay, queer, straight etc.) men have had some success and even fetishization of desire...this does not appear to be the case for many queer, lesbian and bi identified trans women.

The state of affairs for trans women, while also shifting considerably from previous decades with various exciting events targeting issues of inclusion - has a long way to go. Historically, and still today, trans women have been cast out of queer women and lesbian spaces. This is due in no small part to a misunderstanding of transsexuality and transgenderness. It also seems to be due to the complicated feelings many queer and lesbian women have as a result of their interactions with cisgender, heterosexual men. It takes no stretch of the imagination to determine that much of the hostility and exclusion trans women still face in women's spaces, is a direct result of the trauma that queer, bi, and lesbian women have endured as a result of their experiences of oppression and violence by cis hetero men.

It is unfortunate, to say the least, that trans women have borne the brunt of these (legitimate) trauma based, defensive responses. This exclusion of trans women has come in varying degrees of severity, from outright hate and assault of trans women who have sought to enter and be included in women's spaces, to the silent othering that occurs with the mere tolerance of their presence. Even when trans women are actively included in certain events and venues, the many cis women who attend still actively and unconsciously avoid interactions of even the most superficially polite variety. Despite their babeliness, even trans women who have successfully attained community status for their activism, community work, performances or careers still face discrimination when it comes to desire in queer women's spaces.

This is not to say that queer, bi, lesbian or pansexual (QBLP*) women have an obligation to date or be intimate with anyone, trans women included. It is up to each person, woman identified or not, to determine who it is they will allow to access their bodies based in consent, comfortability, desire, context and any other factors deemed relevant to that person with regards to their own body, sexuality and history. What it does mean is that QBLP* women have an obligation to do personal work to understand trans women and accept them as the legitimate, real women they are despite their "pass-ability" and physical embodiment. Cis women, as part of the work of unpacking their own privilege around having societally acceptable gender identities - just as cis men, queer, gay, or otherwise vis a vis trans guys - can and should look within themselves to deal with their own issues so that they may welcome trans women into their spaces without pre-judgment, with the unconditional acceptance they would grant any of their peers, and hopefully with the consideration of the possibility of desireability and attraction.

These conversations have been happening for decades... and thanks to the activism and work of trans women and their pro-trans feminist allies... will continue to build communities of trust and inclusion into the future.


**for some basic reading on respecting trans women click here.